THIS is what Inner Strength Looks Like!

What if we each woke up every morning, looked ourselves in the mirror, and did what this little girl does in the video? Can you imagine what your life would be like? “Jessica” has the right idea. She has tapped into her inner strength, and this video shows us what that looks like.

She is telling herself how much she loves the many blessings in her life. But even more importantly, she is FEELING the blessings as she lists them. Her body is moving with emotion as she affirms her life. The lessons to be learned through the actions of this one little girl is amazing!

Seek out the strength within, and let it truly come alive in you.

Membership for the Strong Single Mom

Introducing our VIP Membership to the Strong Single Mom Network!  Watch the Video as Founder Jacki Semerau explains:

• That the Strong Single Mom Network will ALWAYS have a Free basic membership level
• The Free Membership level is available, thanks to our Supportive Business Partners! (Support the Businesses that Support you as a Single Mom!)
• The VIP Membership will be available for Single Moms who want to THRIVE in life, not simply survive

Here’s to you, a Strong Single Mom searching to truly Connect with your Inner Strength!!

Until Next Time,

Jacki

The Search for Single Mom Empowerment Ends Here

The Strong Single Mom Network brings Single Moms together for Community, Resources, and Empowerment.  Our CORE mission is to help Single Moms connect with their Inner Strength.  Stop living life to merely survive, and start living life with the goal to THRIVE!

If you’ve been looking for these things…the search ends here.  Join us  for our OFFICIAL website launch on Mother’s Day Weekend.  All Single Moms who have registered their free basic membership on our current (pre-launch) website will be receiving awesome discounts and chances to win great prizes.   We look forward to seeing you there

Dating Your Children

The other night, I had the opportunity to take my youngest daughter out for a little one-on-one togetherness.  As the single mom of two daughters, this isn’t always an easy task to accomplish.  However, my oldest daughter was spending the night at a friend’s house, leaving me and my 8 year old with a little time together.

I wanted to make it a special evening, one that would be special and memorable without breaking the bank.  We decided to watch a movie at home.  We picked one that she absolutely loves, but her sister hates (so we typically never watch it!)  After the movie, we headed out for our new favorite treat…Tasti D-Lite.  For less than $5.00, we each get to enjoy a little treat…and an amazing one at that!  We sat outside and ate our pseudo-ice cream, and had the chance to talk about all sorts of things.

She asked about an ex-boyfriend of mine…one that was in the picture off and on for 3 years.  She couldn’t understand why we weren’t together, and why we weren’t going to get married.  I explained to her that he loved us and I loved him, but that love wasn’t enough.  That Mommy would get married ONLY when there was a man that loved me and cherished me right.  A man that loved all 3 of us and wanted to bring us happiness and joy by putting us before himself.  And a man that I felt deserved our affections…one that we can put above ourselves because he deserves it!  After all, that’s what true love is.

That’s when she said “I know.  He left us because I said……” and then she went on to recall a certain situation.  It made me realize that my little girl had been carrying around tremendous guilt about this situation…one that she truly had nothing to do with.  This opened up my eyes to a little piece of her psyche that I might never have seen had I not spent some special time devoted just to her.  I let her know that she absolutely had nothing to do with the break-up.

I then had the chance to tell her about the importance of TRUE love, and not settling.  We talked about how to love yourself, and how the relationship with yourself is so much more important with a relationship with a man.  And how it is okay to be single, and it is okay to be married….but either way, you have to be doing it for the RIGHT reasons.  It was a powerful experience, and I’ll cherish it in my heart forever!  After our treat, we went shopping.  We spent time dreaming about our future as a family of 3.  Priceless!

All of this….simply because I took my daughter on a date.  I encourage all parents to carve out some special one-on-one time with your kids.  If you only have 1 child, it may seem like you do this all the time.  But make sure you take a little time to do something special and just chat with no agenda.  Look into the heart and spirit of your child.  No distractions, no one else around, no preoccupations on your mind.

Our children are a blessing and a gift.  Yes, it’s difficult to raise them with no one else around to help.  But what of it?  Life is difficult, whether we are alone or not.  EVERY life situation has blessings, and it’s up to us to discover them.  You only get one shot at raising your children.  Make sure that when they are adults, you can look back and know that you took the time to really get to know them as children.  Savor the moments.

Creating Healthy Kid-Friendly Snack Habits

I was reading an article on US News & World Report’s site titled “What Parents Can do to Keep Their Kids from Snacking Their Way to Obesity,” and it really got my mind running. The article talks about the factors in today’s society that are contributing to our kids’ weight and health issues.  As I read it, I couldn’t help but think of the challenges that we, as Single Moms, have in trying to ensure our children are getting proper nutrition.

I wanted to encourage our Strong Single Moms to read it.  Lots of good tips, and towards the end, there is a story of Single Mom who has 9 (yes, that N-I-N-E) kids!  And if she can introduce healthy habits into her hectic household, so too can the rest of us!

We’re often busy and frazzled.  It’s super easy to grab the potato chips off the shelf for a snack instead of cutting up an apple, or a quick-fix to go through a fast-food drive thru instead of cooking at home.

So how do we overcome those challenges?  I thought I’d share a few healthy alternatives to junk food that I’ve introduced into our household over the years:

• Pre-cut/prepared fruits and vegetables.  For example, I’ll buy apple slices pre-cut at the grocery store.  I know they have preservatives to keep them fresh, and aren’t as good as peeling and slicing a fresh apple…but it’s still WAY better than Cheetos.
• Frozen Grapes.  A favorite in our house!  Buy them fresh while they’re on sale, then freeze most of them.  They stay good, and are a perfect alternative to chips when the kids want something crunchy to munch on.
• Yogurt and granola.  It’s a great after-school snack, and it’s easy to make.  The kids will usually help themselves.
• No more soda!  Water, vitamin water, and milk are the only options in our house.  Juice on occasion, but I try to keep that to a minimum.
• Whole wheat tortillas.  The kids can put peanut butter and jelly, flavored cream cheese, or sliced fruit on top, then roll it up to make a perfect snack.

Now I’m no nutritionist, and I realize that these may not ALL be Uber-Healthy…but anything we can to help our kids build healthy eating habits are a step in the right direction.  Most of all, I don’t keep alot of sweets or salty junk foods on hand.  Because if it’s out of sight, it’s out of mind.

Please share some of your suggestions/tips/nutritional success stories by commenting below.  We’d all love to hear great ideas that can help us lead our kids on a healthy path!

Empowerment Teleseminars

Calling all Strong Single Moms (or Single Moms LOOKING for strength!)  Make sure you’ve signed up for your free basic membership so you don’t miss out on receiving invitations to our upcoming Empowerment Teleseminars!  Everyone deserves to look in the mirror and TRULY say, “I LOVE my life!”  Truly loving life, and true strength, comes from the inside out, and doesn’t depend on your circumstances.

Until Next Time,

Stay Strong!

Single Moms in the Super Bowl…Thanks Doritos!

The Super Bowl.  It’s a time honored tradition that the best commercials (and most expensive) are rolled out during this iconic game.  In fact, it’s the only time that people actually make it a priority to watch the commercials more so than the main event.

Super Bowl XLIV was no different.  With lots of great commercials (and some bombs…but we won’t talk about that, GoDaddy), one in particular stood out for me.

As the founder of the Strong Single Mom Network, I couldn’t help but to fall in love with the Dorito’s “House Rules” commercial. A light-hearted comedic look at the struggles of dating as a Single Mom, all in less than 30 seconds.

Love it or Hate it, this commercial captured more than just a message about Doritos:

• The hope of the Single Mom as she is picked up for a date…feeling special and sexy when Mr. He-Might-Be-Wonderful shows up at the door.
• The minefield moment of introducing Mister to your child.  The way she bolts and just throws her date into the fire is classic.
• The protectiveness her child naturally feels towards her.  This commercial even shows how her son instantly senses that Mister might not have Mama’s best interests at heart.  (Total truth….a Single Mom’s children can sense ill-intent like a dog can sense fear.)
• The way Mister tries to instantly bond with the child.  No matter what the man’s intentions really are, this has GOT to be a tough moment for any guy trying to date a single mom!  (Note to all men dating a Single Mom…there’s also truth to be found in this scene from Jerry Maguire.  But I digress.)

These are the reasons that the Dorito’s Crash the Super Bowl: House Rules commercial gets my vote as the Best Commercial aired during this year’s Super Bowl.

Quality Time vs. Quantity Time

Single Moms are often pulled in 20 directions at once.  Time is our most valuable commodity, and Single Moms have to be even more discerning than most when it comes to allocating that resource.  So how to we balance it all?

Whether you’re an Entrepreneur, a Busy Professional, Working Overtime, or Working multiple jobs – our position as primary breadwinner can be daunting when we have an equal responsibility as primary caregiver as well.  But no matter how frazzled we feel, our number one responsibility as a MOM is to make our children know how special they are to us.  So how can we convey that message to our offspring when we find it difficult to find spare time?

Is it about Quality over Quantity, or is that just a cliché?  Truth be told, it’s both.  Let’s first define what we mean by these terms.

Quality time is the time we spend solely focused on our children,  Playing board games, telling stories, playing in the park, trips to the museum, etc.  There is nothing else going on other than the enjoyment of time together.  In other words, these are NOT activities we would be doing if we were not seeking fun activities with our kids.  (Find some fun examples of Quality time on the Flagstaff Early Childhood Examiner’s Blog.)

Quantity time is what happens when we include our children in our everyday activities.  Let the kids help cook dinner, clean the house (and make it fun!), help with grocery shopping, laundry, yardwork, the list is endless.  When I first plunged into my life post-divorce, I thought that quantity time meant spending a great deal of QUALITY time with my kids.  Like it didn’t count if I was spending time with my kids as I multi-tasked doing things necessary for life to continue.  But as time moves on, I find my kids appreciate the amount of time I spend helping them with their homework almost as much as the time we spend playing games.  (Almost.  After all, it IS homework!)

But the point is this:  you may not have the time to invest in great amounts of Quality time with your kids.  But you can always find fun ways to include them in your day-to-day activites…no matter what their ages are.  Whether it’s quality, quantity, or both, the most important factor is to make sure you’re smiling, laughing, and truly enjoying each other’s company.  THAT is what you’re children will cherish in their hearts for the rest of their lives.

Once Upon A Time…I didn’t have to do that!

Being a Single Mom, we get the fun of handling ALL the projects, chores, and duties around the house.  Typically, there’s no one else around to share the responsibilities.  When I became a single mom in November 2005, I found this truth to be overwhelming.  I didn’t want to take on the things that my ex-husband used to take responsibility for around the house.  And every time I would try my hand at something he used to take care of, I would feel a terrible sense of loss.

I remember wondering if I would ever get used to doing it all on my own.

As time went by, I noticed a shift happening.  I found I actually enjoyed conquering the things that I never had to do before.

For example, my Ex-husband used to be in charge of taking care of all foreign creatures that found their way into our house.  Spiders, lizards, moths…you name it.  I had always been terrified of insects!  He would come to my rescue and save me from the Big Bad Bugs.

So when I entered the Land of Single Momdom and encountered my first unwelcome creepy-crawly guest, I about lost my mind!  Getting rid of that bug was terrifying for me.  When the task was accomplished, I found myself crying for my lost marriage. (Although even then, I recognized that having a Live-In Exterminator was NO reason to stay in a bad relationship!)

Fast forward a couple of years.  The girls and I moved into a home at the base of a mountain.  That first night in our house, I found 7 live scorpions!  As it turned out, the house was infested.  I took drastic measures to eliminate these poisonous creatures from our house…and it helped.  But we would still find an average of 2 live scorpions in the house every week.  And you know what?  Never…Not once…did I freak out!  In fact, we made a game of catching and killing them!  Just like a Virginia Slim Ad, I’d come a long way, Baby!

What chores or responsibilities have you taken on since becoming a Single Mom?  Or maybe you’re a newly-single mom who is struggling through the transition of taking on duties once left to Mr. Not-So-Right. 

Leave a comment, tell your story, and let me know!

Thanksgiving Leftovers

Here are a few ideas….enjoy!

Turkey Cups

In a bowl shred about 2 cups turkey

Add about 2 cups or so of leftover stuffing

Mix well …if you need to for moisture add some leftover gravy…in a buttered cupcake tin drop even scoops of mixture in …using your fingers to form the sides and bottom

Now fill them with leftover mashed potatoes…if you want you could also put a thin layer of left over corn…

Bake (350 covered until set about 30 minutes… remove cool until you can get them out of pan with out burning yourself or them breaking…top with left over gravy….serve!   Makes about 12 cups.

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Stuffed meatloaf

About 1 lbs of ground sirloin

1 lb ground sauage

If your stuffing has sausage in it…increase sirloin to 2 lbs

Mix your meats…add one egg salt and pepper

On a large piece of plastic wrap form meat mixture into one retangular piece about ½ thick…then put a layer of left over stuffing

Then a layer of left over mashed spuds…this could be reg potatoes or sweet potatoes

Using the plastic wrap to help you roll into a tube… place in baking sheet cover with left over gravy and bake at 375 for about 30-40 minutes…

Let rest …move to platter…scrap up dripping, add to saute pan , add some more broth and bring to boil…reduce down , strain ..then add about 1-2 tablesppons butter….stir…serve in bowl on the side with  meatloaf of pour over each serving…..If  you made home made cranberry sauce…that can go on before the stuffing.

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Winter Veggie Creamed soup

Left over sweet potatoes..mashed

3 med to large carrots , peeled and chopped

One med onion chopped

3 stalks celery chopped

2-3 good size garlic cloves chopped

In a pot saute carrots, onion, celery, and garlic until they are tender

Add about 4-6 cups turkey stock

Bring to a boil. Reduce cover and simmer for about an hour

Remove cover  raise heat  to reduce it down …notice liquid height on pot…have it reduce down about 1 inch or so…cool.

In blender in small batches puree with left over sweet potatoes

Return all back to pot and bring to boil…simmer and serve …longer it simmers the better it tastes!

Top with sour cream and chunks of bacon and green onions chopped finely…yummooooo

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These ideas make a new twist on left overs but gives you all the Thanksgiving Day tastes in one yummy bite!

All recipes were made on the spot and with out ‘huge” regard to measurements..so be free…use your creativity and these recipes as guides to making a fun leftover dinner with the kids!

Happy Eatings,

Dani